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Bloody winter, there's a lot to remember to pack when you're going to the football after work. Extra layers, woolen socks, poncho, mittens, water, snacks. I was 90% of my way to the train station yesterday morning when I realised I'd left my seat padding behind, and I was bummed.

I've been pretty bummed for nearly three years now, due to the constant pain in the spot inches from my taint, where my hamstring objects to being connected to my pelvis. Every kind of treatment, drug and therapy makes no difference. If I want to sit, e.g. for a football match, on a football stadium cheap seat, I need my padding.

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Lunchtime, before the game, I went to Kmart. That's where my original butt cushion, a small exercise mat, came from. They were all out.
I was considering purchasing a full body exercise mat when I spotted actual cushions, being sold at typical Kmart prices that make me believe global equality and my quality of life are mutually exclusive. I found a stray cushion, not to thin, soft but firm. I had little choice, I'd pay the few dollars for potentially a single use pillow. When I got to the checkout I discovered it was on clearance, and only 50 cents! When she told me the price I thought she was talking about the shopping bag!

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Several beers and a few quarters of football later, I was telling everyone about this bargain (including you, dear reader) because this cushion did an incredible job of helping my tendon avoid being sandwiched between hard plastic and my skeleton. I thought, imagine the delicious irony if this was a magical cushion that might completely cure my fear of chairs. Thousands spent on doctors, injections and medication wasted compared to one 50 cent pillow.

After today, I can sadly confirm that it is not a magic pillow. What a pain in the arse. At least I can keep using it for the football, and it kept my cheeks warm.


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