I Made My Own Liquid Fertiliser

Last year I experienced an order of operations error when I buried Dynamic Lifter under some plants before I learnt that Dynamic Lifter is basically ground up dead chickens and poo.

Nash was definitely aware of the ingredients.

I didn't want to make that mistake again this year, and have to deal with another week of dog turds the colour of black holes. Nor did I want to waste three-quarters of a bag of Dynamic Lifter. So, I got an old pillow case, put two handfuls of Dynamic Lifter in it and tied a knot, put the pillowcase in a bucket and filled it with water. One week later I had liquid Dynamic Lifter and a pillow case I'll probably only ever use for guests. I mixed the bucket 1:3 with water in a watering can and I'll find out in a few weeks how much my plants liked that.

This year, Nash is very sad that the bird of paradise plants smell exactly like the buried treats of last autumn, but only taste like celery.