Every Silver Lining has a Dark Cloud
I have to say that after a few taps on the steering wheel of life to point me in new directions yesterday, coupled with binging on the first ten months of 2005 entries before bed last night, I was feeling good today.
2005 was a fantastic year. I was fit and healthy and though I was dealt a good serve of challenges I took them all in my stride, grew a little and had a lot of fun. So when I went about life today I tried to inhale a little bit of that 2005 spirit into the things I did. I aimed to be more personal, and less insecure. I intended to write more and be more confident! I felt charged, like this was a turning point.
Before tonight was up I decided to pick up reading where I left off last night - November 2005 - and to do that I clicked the archive link for 2007 and was about to reduce the year argument a couple of digits when the first post grabbed my attention. And as I read through the month I realised that the same feelings, the same intentions of confidence, direction and extroversion I was having today I was writing about having last six months ago.
And then when I did get to November 2005 I realised the same thing had happened again. I was more skittish and unsure about my future then than I thought that year. And in 2005 as the summer sun first came out I was making the same vows and self-evaluations. It became clear to me that every year I seem to cycle from - to steal a life experience from a baby turtle - shell to the great wide sea. Only to every year wake up and find myself digging out of the sand again. So I had an epiphany but it seemed so useless now.
But, the difference is, this year I'm getting my groove back way before Summer.