Party

Dusty's party last night was horrific. Horrifically hilarious. The events I try and regale from herein will try and convey this, but it will be difficult.

I arrived slightly late after returning from dinner with Pop and the family. Dusty had made a half-arse attempt at making the party a costume party, but other than allowing himself to wear a cummerbund and ensuring the rest of us had to endure Craig shirtless for the evening, not much effort was put into dressing up. Nevertheless, feeling slightly bad about last time I went to his house, I put on a fireman hat and within 2 minutes of arriving I donated it to Dusty as reimbursement for last time. Some guilt alleviated, I then joined the majority of the group outdoors when I talked manly with Kat and the hilarious German Bene. There was some banter, many sideways German jokes and attempts at pidgeon-deutch. Conversation of course led to the topic of whether or not Bene was a Hitler youth or not. To get to the bottom of that I conducted a word association experiment to reveal that, indeed, when I said "Zieg" he though "Heil!". Kat was bemused with this, and also wanted to play, however she wasn't a Hitler Youth so I declined her offer. To which she proffered "but my room-mates call me a communist... but I'm not.". We'd see about that, so I agree to word association, and open with "Voluntary Student Unionism", to which she associates "Bad!". I inform her that she is a communist, and then immediately leave so that Bene may no longer be distracted by me as he tries to teach Kat the German meaning of Love. (He later confirmed to me that it was 'leibe'.)
However I was now on a mission, having realised just exactly where I was: Dusty's house, at a party filled with arts students I was essentially in the Anti-VSU stronghold and as a pseudo Young Liberal it was time to ruffle some feathers.
With Sam's help, and unwittingly Dusty's, we secretively used his computer to print of many A4 Copies of many pro VSU slogans. When I say secretively, I mean as secretively as was possible where you're in the middle of a house that's having a party in it. Many close calls were had when it was almost discovered what we were up to. Nevertheless, somehow despite Dusty's sucky printer we managed to print off about 30 posters with giant phrases like:

• VSU IS GOOD
  
• I <3 VSU
  
• VSU IT'S WHAT TO DO
  
• What do we want? VSU When do we want it? NOW
  
• WE BUILT THIS CITY ON VSU
  

Sam and I then tried to subtly make it to Dusty's room unnoticed where we could tape them all up in our protest against the man probably more anti VSU than anyone.
About a third of the way through sticking them all over Dusty's walls and roof, we were interrupted by Kat who wanted to know why we were in Dusty's room. Completely oblivious to the posters around her, Sam and I tried yet another round of excuses to make drunken people leave us until the jokes peak, however eventually she noticed and I had to carry her out and this created a slight storm, which drew Dusty's attention. Dusty was then alerted to the situation is his room, and I then watched what was probably in the top 10 most hilarious things I've ever seen. Dusty, a little drunk, staggers to the closed door of his bedroom and slowly opens it. Inside all large available spaces have been covered with pro-VSU slogans. I laughed hard, so hard I almost cried, it was quite perfect. Dusty, I'll admit, handled it alright, he's a good guy, unfortunately the rest of the art students did not take it so well, and there was a small riot as the posters were destroyed and taken outside to be burnt. I managed to preserve several posters for a time but alas.
Again, this is just one of those stories than cannot be retold in a manner as good as being there, but by God was it funny, it was like living in a sitcom.

Other Hilarious Events:
"No, that's what I'm saying; you should only go university if you can afford it. Poor people don't deserve education, this way the rich get richer and the poor get poorer" - This is not something you should say to a bi-sexual, hippy arts politician, especially after you call her a communist lesbian. This is how I became a 'have' and a glass of water became a 'have not'.

While Kat was in Dusty's room alone, the above mentioned girl walks in. Dusty, suddenly gifted a brainwave, jumps up and slams the door shut, barricading it. The two girls immediately start banging.
'What the fuck are you doing?' is raised, Dusty, slurring slightly, tells us not to worry.
'No No, you see, if I put them in there they will start making out... because I left my camera in there...'
I cannot believe this theory actually worked, as when we opened the door minutes later, Dusty instantly garnered a lot of respect.

"Cowan you drove 2 hours across town while drunk to give a lesbian a lift home?"
"No No, it's ok, I got her number!"

That and the sheer amount of German jokes I made, God, I love Bene.