Come What May

Despite feeling so rushed during every moment of free time that I have these days, I somehow found some hours last night to read through my last year of journal as well as look at a whole bunch of photos in a typical nostalgia binge; laughing at the good times, cringing at the bad ones.

This initially seemed like a waste of my precious time, but I took some value from it. Lately everything has seemed a bit disjointed and weird as I entertain feelings like "is this going to be like this for the rest of my life!?" and "is this going to be like this for the rest of my life?!" and other combinations with italics in different places.

However in the course of my self-indulgence I read through some of the entries of last May and I recalled that I felt remarkably similar at the same point in time last year. I even went as far as quitting my job for no real reason. The thing is, last year was fantastic! One of the best years of my life!

So I'm feeling optomistic now. But that didn't stop me from still feeling a little strange as I went to sleep on Sunday night. I think it was because I was sober.